One Day at a Time


Learning to live with chronic pain and auto immune disorders has been both a challenge and a learning experience.  I have always been a major planner and love to plan months and even years ahead.  There was a sense of accomplishment with planning every little detail, creating goals and check lists of how I was going to meet those goals.  I had a very difficult time accepting that with my health I was not sure if I would be able to meet the goals I had set.  I would always take on more, both at work and in my personal life trying to keep distracted from what was really going on. 
Endometriosis pain causing me to need my heating pad and cuddle puppy. 

Once the doctors’ visits started my planner filled up with appointments; specialists, family doctor, blood work, and any other testing they could think of sending me to.  I was afraid to tell my friends and family about all of it because I didn’t want them to worry about me.  I also felt that as an “adult” and being married that it was my responsibility to handle what was happening and work through it on my own.  Finally, it got to a point where my world was falling around me, my physical health, marriage, and emotional health were falling apart.  I finally had to say the words I was so afraid of, “I need help.”    

Turns out those words are not as scary as I had thought and there were many people in my life who were there ready to help.  The past seven years have taught me that I am still strong even though I have made mistakes and have asked for help.  I still can live my life and learn to enjoy it even though I will have days I am in pain or sick.  I cannot control when the pain or sick days hit me and there is no point getting angry or frustrated over those days.  They are as much a part of my life as the good days.  I cannot always do what I used to be able to and I need to learn my own limits so I can enjoy my life and not push myself to hard.  Over doing it only leads to more days filled with pain, or even a trip to the hospital. 

Hiking with my girls. 
Learning to take life one day at a time has been difficult, but rewarding.  Too often we rush through our day and don’t take time to enjoy the little things, those little things end up being the big memories that we have later in life.  Even on the days where pain takes over or I end up sick and unable to fulfill my plans for the day, there is still good in each day.  Each back slide is just as crucial in moving me forward as the good days are.  My girls are always the good in my day, even when it is spending the day on the couch recovering from being sick.  They are always by my side and make me happy even when the pain takes over.  Today has been my fourth backslide in the past month, from being on antibiotics for three weeks, to running a fever and having to stay home from work.  I still know that these are just days and I am strong enough to allow my body time to rest and heal before pushing myself to move on.         

A sick day home with my girls, thankful they stay by my side. 

Tips:
1.     Learn to ask for help.
2.     Learn your limits, allow your body time to heal.
3.     Enjoy every day to the fullest.   
         


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